Suspicious Guy

[?]

*Psssst!*

H-Hey you!

You wanna get your hands on some great stuff? Come on over!

[Suspicious Guy]

Hey there tough guy. You look smart enough to recognize a bargain when it's right in front of your eyes.

Well, well, well. Aren't you a pretty girl. Today just happens to be your lucky day!

So just tell me what you want, and I'll cut you a deal from amongst my valuable, yet affordable, wares.

Ah, you into Potions, eh?

Yeah, I got the stuff!

Here it is! High quality Red Potion! It starts working right away once you take it. Once it hits your lips, you can't stop. This stuff is that good.

C'mon dude. This is the latest Red Potion. I got it from a close friend of a friend, you know, a real dependable source, and it's real cheap too. You can't pass this up!

White Potions? Oh, those don't exist. But, er, if someone's selling that kind of stuff, bring it to me so I can, um, test the difference. But yeah, I got the real stuff.

You can heal all your wounds by drinking Red Potions! And I'll sell you one for just 500 zeny!

Now, how cheap is that?! Since they're in such high demand, I can only sell you 100 of

them at a time.

Ah duuuuuude~ You're breakin' my heart! I mean, at these prices, I'm practically performing charity!

W-waaaait! You didn't let me tell you the part about how Red Potions help you lose and gain weight in all the right places! Waaaaait!

Whoa...

I can't let you buy that many. I mean, it's not like, you know, there's a trace impurity in these Potions or anything like that...

Oh maaan~

Are you

short on dough?

That's no good.

Now I gotta find some other sucker to dump this junk on! *Ahem* I mean, come again!

What would a strong guy like you want a knife for? Those will just break under the force of your incredibly powerful swings!

Now...

What you really

need is a manly Dagger.

A nice lady like you? Come on now, kitchen knives are for old naggy wives and the hired help.

need is a fine, exquisite

French Dagger to match your beauty and elegance.

I call it...

The Main Gauche! I invented it myself. And I'm only selling it for 9,400 zeny!

A sheath?

Whoa, that's almost asking too much! Alright, alright...

Since I like you so much, I'm giving you a free sheath with your purchase! Now how's that

for a bargain?

There's no way you can pass this up! Now, how many do you want?

Man, how many chances of a lifetime have you passed up? Man, I hope you win the lottery...

You'd probably

pass that up too.

Whoa!

I can't sell that many Daggers! That'll attract the Prontera Chiv--I mean, um, I was gonna donate some Daggers to... Hungry children?

Short on zeny?

When the greatest deal in your life is right before your eyes?! Tragic, truly tragic...

A Manteau? That's old news! You know what's the latest in protective armors?

Now why would such a beautiful woman wear something out of style? You know what would make you look even better?

That's right!

A Hood! Wearing one of those is the quickest way to win respect these days!

If you've got a Hood on, monsters will fear you and run away in terror! And check out this sturdy fabric. I can pull it all I want and it won't tear!

Haha! What are you saying? You don't need drawstrings! The space age Rayon and Nylon and Krypton fibers keep the Hood secure on your head!

Man...

So much technology was invested into this Hood. Can you believe I'm only selling it for 930 zeny?

Clearly, this is the deal of the century. So how many do you want?

Awww...

It wasn't because of the whole drawstrings thing, was it?

Whoa~!

I can't sell you that many! What are you trying to do, take advantage of me?

Oh nuts...

Short on zeny, eh?

You sure like to ask for the impossible. Well, let me tell you right now. No other Merchant in the world sells the goods only I can offer.

You just gotta believe me!

No need to look anywhere else at all when I clearly have the best items around!

Please come back sometime, and buy more of my stuff. I love a customer who knows what they want! Hehe~